Are you stuck in a rut? As human beings, we each have a personal comfort zone, so ruts are perfectly normal, and we all get stuck in them from time to time.
However, when left for extended periods of time ruts can become dream killers. They keep us stuck in a frustrating repetitious cycle that gets us nowhere in terms of personal growth, when we should be venturing out into the world, growing, expanding and experiencing new things. You may find yourself asking questions such as “Why am I here? Surely I didn’t inhabit this planet just to repeat the same old stuff, day in and day out.”
As spiritual beings, we crave a sense of purpose. It may be disguised as a vague sense of anxiety, but even if we don’t recognise it, it’s there. When a clear purpose has not been established, it often manifests in the mindset of getting by, e.g. getting out of bed in the morning, getting through your work day, getting out of the cold and into your home, getting through the week. Then after the weekend the cycle starts all over again. This is a mindset of survival and it is based around escapism, rather than a desire for what you do want.
Typical rut situations
Here are three typical ruts:
Lack of purpose rut – It could be that your days are all pretty much the same, with nothing new happening in your life. Eg. The 9-5 work life of living to pay bills and waiting to retire so you can then start living. Perhaps your job is no longer challenging, and you are just going through the motions.
Lack of passion rut – How often is there passion in your life? I’m not just talking the romantic sense, but just in having something that ignites your soul, completely engages and excites you, and gives you the feeling of losing yourself in time. Passion is felt in the heart and soul, and not having this means you are only scratching at the surface of life. The rut often comes about when you either search for passion in ‘things’, or you keep attracting negative situations, because feeling something (even hurt) is better than feeling nothing at all.
Lack of exercise rut – When you go for an extended period of time without moving, the body gets used to it. It becomes so comfortable to do the bare minimum physical movement (e.g. getting out bed and into your car) that anything more begins to feel foreign. Without fitness, all other areas of your life are affected.
How to get out of a rut?
Ruts are rooted in the mindset. No matter where in your life you are stuck, the rut is simply a reflection of ‘stuckness’ within your mind. The first thing that has to happen is to acknowledge how the rut is serving you. Yes, that’s right – your being in a rut is benefiting you! All behaviour serves us on some level, or we wouldn’t do it. If you try to escape your rut without identifying how it is serving you, you might escape temporarily, but your newfound rut-freedom will likely be short-lived.
Explore your beliefs around change and success. It could also be that you have a belief that you are not capable of being more. It could be fear of how things will change once you break free. Perhaps you are afraid of your own success? Fear of uncertainty is the number one reason why people don’t change. Life coaching can help you identify and become aware of the hidden benefits of your rut, and also help you dismantle any limiting beliefs or fears that may be keeping you stuck.
Start doing things differently. Ruts are habits and therefore are strengthened by repetition. You can break down the walls by doing just one thing differently every day. Go for a walk after dinner. Start reading about a course that you’d like to do. Or get all your housework done on a Friday night, and see what you feel like doing differently when you wake up on the weekend to a tidy and spotless house.
Focus on what you want. If you don’t know what you want, focus on what makes you feel good, and from the state of feeling good, your actions will lead you in the direction of your soul’s intention.
Take baby steps. A common excuse for staying in a rut is simply not knowing what you need to do, or even what you want to be doing. You may feel that you need to know what you will ultimately “end up” doing in life. Sure, there are some people who just seem to know right from the start what they want to do in life, but most find it by building on what they have, one step at a time. That is the easiest way! Taking one small step each day in the direction of what you enjoy is better than going for weeks or months or even years doing nothing, because you didn’t know the end result. Successful people are not those who found an elevator, but those who never hesitated to start climbing the stairs.
If you need help climbing out of your rut and getting back into your jazz and flow, contact Susan to book a chat.